Afterall, Tomorrow is Another Day.

Today was going to be THE DAY.  Again.  How many times have I been here now?  Too many, quite frankly.  But today was going to be different.  It is the first of the month; Its a Monday.  What could make for a better formula for success?

So I prepared myself for the past week or so.  Trying really hard not to binge on "my last days", and just mentally preparing myself.  I weighed myself yesterday. I hung a new calendar on my closet door with tangible and realistic goals written on it with the further expectation of recording my healthy intake, exercise, and overall mood.

My weight has climbed again.  Just 6 measly pounds shy of my heaviest weight ever.  In case you need reminding, that means I am now at 152.  In a size 12.  Barely. 

 Yup, today was going to be the day.

Was.

Was.

My goal for this week was rather simple.  No eating out.  This including no sneaking snacks from my job which has been increasingly difficult to resist.

I woke up this morning with confidence, and a little bit of excitement to start on this journey again.  All was going well at work.  I brought my lunch (not the best....a PBJ with yogurt), I had my dinner all ready to go (again, not the greatest...leftover ham dinner).  I even brought an emergency snack for work when my munchies hit.  Yup, what a great set up for success!

Then something happened.  I don't know what.  Around 1:30, I got that predictable snack attack.  I remember going through so many different thoughts and emotions until I finally gave in, and instead of reaching for my clementines, I reached for the fruit snacks.  From work.  That led to another pack of fruit snack.  Then it led to a bag of fritos.  Then to a piece of Dove Chocolate.  Then another piece of Chocolate.  Its that uncontrollable, I gotta eat now-I gotta have it kind of mentality.  I failed today.

But with my failure, came one small success.  Once home, I had that "I already screwed up, I might as well go big" mentality.  I wanted a blizzard.  Bad like.  All those self sabbatoging and rationalizing thoughts came and went.  And came again.

Instead, I took a bath and read a book (all this at 6:00 tonight).  Once I was disrobed, I wouldn't leave my house to go get ice cream.  Until I remembered that I could go through the drive through (hmmmmmm......).  But no, I didn't.  I am ice cream free.

Tomorrow will be here before I know it, and I can try again.  Same goal.  Different day.  Different results too!  After all, tomorrow is another day......